Saturday 25th September.

Venue: GL2.

Working Party: B parents + Father Brooks, who has quickly worked out a clever way to claim an early lead at the top of the fledgling SB (Stadium Builders’) Premier League.

Format: 2 games of 30 minutes duration.

Match 1 v Wokingham: Buckland and McLarney are the initial subs after scoring last week at Newbury. For all their innate intelligence, neither can understand the logic, which isn’t surprising as there isn’t any. Very little in the game for the first 20 minutes with the midfield four competing well, the back line + GK looking solid and Brooks lively up front. We nearly take the lead on 12 minutes when Bennett’s free kick is fumbled by the keeper but Vaile, who gets in to a good position, can’t keep his effort down.

A horrid goal (from our perspective) sees Wokingham take the lead, but Clifford’s determination sees him nip in to equalise. Another X-certificated concession gifts the visitors the advantage for a second time and an own goal at the back post makes it three.

Strangely, despite the result, we played better for much of this game than for most of the Newbury fixture last week.

Match 2 v St Albans: We make a lively start and take the lead on six minutes, Clifford escaping his marker to head home Buckland’s right-wing corner. Brooks is denied by the keeper following a good break as the midfield maintain the competitive edge they found in their first outing. Defensively we are more decisive than the Wokingham game however, with Hayes, Buckland and The Model each turning in fine displays.

Bennett sees his free kick clip The Saints’ crossbar and Vaile goes close following a good run late on as we see out the thirty minutes to complete a good win and record a first clean sheet of the season. Folley seems happier now than he was an hour ago, but whether that’s because of how the last match has gone or the fact that he’s off to an upmarket shindig in the West End, no-one really knows.

Numbers: Over the course of the day, from 9am when the first people arrived to 4.50 when the last ones departed, we saw eight matches featuring ten teams and a hundred or so players; 206 spectators have come through the big green gates, 320 sausages have been eaten and £400 taken at the refreshment bar. Eight toilet rolls were used, an average of 2.67 per cubicle, an interesting fact for those people who think like that. The Chef smiled on three separate occasions, The Groundsman made a

ten-minute appearance during which time he only moaned twice and Manning didn’t try to orchestrate a loan. Not even once. All in all, a good day at the office.

Post-script: Gloucester City lose 3-0 at Gateshead, the manager’s sacked on the way back and ex-GPSFA captain Lee Mansell is appointed interim leader. Out of the darkness comes light. Watch this space.

Team: Folley; Male Model, Haye, Vaile; White, Clifford, Bennett, Manning; Brooks; Buckland, McLarney.